Our mind loves doing these millions of scenarios where it can control the outcome and we can feel safe knowing that we can manage the worst-case scenario. But, 99.99% of the time that scenario doesn’t happen and we are left expecting the worst, with our energy consumed by our mind trying to control it, instead of taking things as they are and stop wasting energy on what we actually don’t want to happen. The saying “Let’s hope for the best and prepare for the worst” is more about maintaining the optimistic scenario, not the other way around.
So, when we have a discussion with someone on a certain topic, we can act from past experience and think we already know what that person is trying to share and in addition we jump into conclusions very fast or we can approach it with openness and be curious about what that person is trying to say. Sometimes it can enrich our perspective with a very different view and we get to learn something from it even if is just a discussion. This has the power to change our way of seeing the world…if we allow it.
Thinking you know everything doesn’t leave any space for growth as all new information is automatically dismissed. The “know-it-all” attitude is usually the most visible sign that comes up more often around us. This is a clear message that insisting won’t change anything in this case.
It’s very clear that there is no possible way that we know everything…there are so many things that happen in background that we don’t know, or things impacting someone else and someone else…and in the end getting to impact us, that we cannot perceive all of these. And that’s the beauty of life, not knowing everything, every step that follows, every challenge that expects us only makes life more vibrant and exciting. Of course this depends on how we see things as some of us might see things as “why is this happening to me?” versus “oh, this is an opportunity to change something that isn’t working and have a better result next time”.
“You don’t need a new life, just a new lens through which to view the one you have.”
Marianne Williamson
Most of the times we already have what we need, but we are too focused on what we want to appreciate it and enjoy it.
We are so used to get new things, new people, new achievements, that we forget what’s next to us. We often think we can find better and that there isn’t any worth in fixing things, and that can be the case, but did we actually look and decided properly, or are we rushed to the most comfortable, luxuriant, desired thing/person/achievement.
People are used to want what the crowd wants, to do what is expected to do (go to school, work, get married, have kids, get a house, get a car… etc) so they can be accepted. But then they realize that they are living someone else’s life or they get depression even if they did everything that society, friends, family expected them to do. All of this happens because they did everything in auto-pilot, rushing through things, not feeling them, not knowing who they are. And when you don’t know who you are …you do not act aligned, you just perform and that feels empty and disconnected.
Universe always knows better. That’s why we have different challenges at a certain moment…and everything we go through prepares us for the next challenge, even if we still have things to learn while we keep going. We just have to be open and let ourselves guided by our inner power.
What’s the point to be mean to each other, or envy each other…. or hate, humiliate, punish … or demonstrate people that you are right? when we can be open, united, supportive and aligned ?
Of course, you’ll say it’s easier to do the bad things instead of good ones and a lot of people are in that side, but divided we are weak. Taking advantage of someone that is kind is not something to be proud of. Kind people give trust and is seen as weakness, but when trust is broken…they just move on because they were true and authentic and that’s not something that can be taken for granted.
As you already know, everything happens with a reason and the reason is not as important as the lesson. Take the lesson and focus on what’s teaching you, not on repaying what went wrong.
If you’re not sure about where you are, find a quiet place, put chill music on background and try these questions:
Am I saying my truth or lying to myself ?
Am I authentic or trying to avoid conflict ?
Do I live my life of just trying to survive ?
The first answer is the one. Everything that comes after is the mind trying to change the first answer as most of the times is uncomfortable. Admitting that you’re lying to yourself (or finding too many excuses for the situation), isn’t easy, but it’s the starting point of the change.
“Sometimes it’s not the people who change, it’s the mask that falls off.”
Haruki Murakami
Be yourself, be true, be authentic and everything around you aligns accordingly. It may seem like you’re loosing, but in fact Universe is cleaning the space for new people, new job, new house etc. that are meant for you.
Quick notice: when you start doing this, there is no going back. you cannot unknow what you learn and you cannot rewind to previous setup.
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